Dirty Bertie

Hello all. I aquired a kitten yesterday, or should I say it aquired me. I went to the shop to buy credit for my mobile, then felt something weird on my leg to discover that he had climbed up my trousers all the way above my knee. Needless to say I was instantly taken by this mangy mite + worm infested scrawny little bugger. He's very sweet. I took him straight to the vet and he gave him worming tablets (he sat quiet as a mouse in the cardboard box, the vet was well impressed). Then I took him home and he slept on me (climbs up onto my lap whilst I sit in the hammock). I told vanessa how sweet and lovely he is but about an hour before she got home the worming tablets kicked in and he turned into a liquid shit machine, dribbling diahorrea all over the balcony with a little turd hanging out his bum constantly. Needless to say she now thinks I'm utterly insane and a whole new level of filthy for bringing in a shit-squirting street cat into our house. Hmmm, he seems to have stopped with the arse jet this morning however and in one of his myriad poo piles I found the source of his troubles, in the shape of a very big (around 3 or 4 inches long I rekon) and very dead gut worm all curled up. Poor litttle chap.

I've called him Bertie (after the Irish PM)

He follows me all round the house (the cat, not the worm) literally at my heel - to the point where sometimes I lift my foot up and he stands under it, I move my foot (in order to put in on the floor) and he shadows it, thus making me dance around on one foot so as not to break his spine. He's not the sharpest tool in the box, but he's very very sweet, except for the several kilos of rancid faecal matter I had to hose off the bascony this morning - I swear there was twice his body weight out there today.

Love to all